When we started traveling fulltime in September 1999, we left in the Louisville, Kentucky area, four parents, three children, one grandchild, one sister, one brother and an assortment of close friends and relatives. We also had two grandchildren in Texas, a son in eastern Kentucky, a son and two grandchildren in Minnesota, a brother in Ohio and a sister in Indiana. There were also spouses, nieces, nephews and aunts and uncles. Since then there have been marriages and births to extend our families. Our plan was to return to Kentucky twice a year for family visits and once every year or two circle the country and visit relatives at their homes.

But plans do get changed and often at a moments notice. Three months into fulltiming we spend Christmas with family in Kentucky and then drove to warm weather in southern Texas planning to stay the winter. One hour before arriving in our campground we received word my father we had just left was in a hospital dying. We turned the motorhome north and drove around the clock until we reached Kentucky. My father recovered and we got him placed in a nursing home, then returned to southern Texas. Seven weeks later we flew to Kentucky to help my parents and take care of their legal matters. My mother discharged him from the nursing home and took him home. At that time she became his 24-hour care giver.

In the next four years we returned to Kentucky often to help my parents through emergencies. We flew from Phoenix once to give them some help. I called my mother from Jasper, Alberta to find she had fallen and broke her arm and hip. It was a 2,600 mile trip but we returned immediately to help Mom through therapy and take care of Dad around the clock. We discussed the need of a nursing home or assisted living community but they would not talk about moving. Another six or eight times we cut our travels short so we could spend more time in Kentucky.

We talked to my parents almost daily but they never told us how bad their situation was. In February of this year we received a phone call that my mother was in the hospital and a neighbor man was sleeping on the couch watching Dad. We made the trip from southern California to Kentucky in 4 1/2 days and told my parents they were going to a very nice nursing home since both needed help with every day activities. We sold their house and furnishings and their car, plus spent many days taking care of legal matters. This took 2 1/2 months and we were surprised how much we got done in that time.

It was time to start our summer travels so we headed west again and called my parents or the nursing staff daily. We should have guessed what would happen next. In California we received word my mother was in rapidly failing health and did not have long to live so we drove back to Kentucky in five days this time. That was over two months ago and we are still in Kentucky and both of my parents are "hanging on." They are ages 94 and 89.

Now don't take this wrong. I love my parents very much and will do anything for them. That is why we return to Kentucky so often. Family does matter and we are always ready to help in a loving way.

In addition to my parents we have rushed back to Kentucky for others. We returned from southern Alabama for the birth of a granddaughter. Linda flew in from Sacramento, California when her brother-in-law died and she drove in from Oklahoma when her daughter was admitted to the hospital. I drove in from northern Ohio for my first wife's mother's funeral. During our five plus years on the road we have returned to Kentucky about once every three months for emergencies. Our plans have changed often with a midnight phone call.

For various reasons we did not return for close relatives' funerals or three weddings of close family members. If we had returned for those events we would have been back in Kentucky every two months this last five years.

The reason I'm writing this is because many people ask what to do with aging parents if you want to travel. I don't have an answer other than do what you think is best. I had an aunt and uncle who retired and talked about traveling, but they wanted to take care of his older sister and after she died they would travel. The sister lived in her own home and they cooked her one meal a day, did her shopping, took her to the doctor and checked on her several times a day. She died at age 96 and by then my aunt and uncle were too old to travel. They always said they wished they had traveled when they were young and healthy enough to enjoy life, but both died shortly after the sister.

All I can tell people wanting to travel is that "family matters" and do what you need to do.